EB with Plurk Friends : February 2010 Challenge

WARNING: This article is filled with childish reasoning and juvenile thinking. For example, a cartoon character is taken way too seriously here.

No, I didn’t forget about this. I promised to do something challenging every month of this year. It just took a while to get myself mentally prepared to write this down. It’s been a month since I did the challenge so I might miss a few important details. You’re just gonna have to take my word on this one. Yeah, blame it on my short-term memory as always.

One of my January challenges included leaving the social network site Plurk. One of the consequences of that decision is the fact that I would no longer be in constant contact with the folks I got to know through Plurk. I met two of them in person last month and this served as my challenge for February.

Some of you might think it’s funny that I even consider this challenging. Seeing in person someone you’ve just known online may seem normal for most people nowadays. But for someone like me, it has been a huge no-no. Well, at least until I decided to do this challenge. Let me explain why.

It’s been 8 years since I started using “Little Wolf” as my online nickname. As I mentioned in my About page, I got this nick from the English translation of Syaoran. He’s the guy on that picture above. Uh… a main character in my favorite anime series Cardcaptor Sakura.

So what’s the connection of that to my February challenge? The answer lies in Syaoran’s character in the anime. The guy likes to keep to himself. He gets mad easily (often to Sakura) and isn’t very sociable. Indeed, he’s even called a “brat” by Kero-chan in the TV show. But underneath all these, he’s a caring and loving person.

I fancied myself having a personality a lot like Syaoran. I saw myself in him. And you have no idea how far I’ve gone to show the world that I was like Syaoran. In one instance, I found a way to make him the subject of my college project. Corny, I know. But to an inexperienced kid, I think this is normal… relating oneself to a cartoon character.

Becoming Syaoran…

Identifying myself as “Little Wolf” online, I eventually developed certain rules that needed to be followed so I could stay true to my namesake.

#1: I shall never have a real photo of myself up online.

As a fansite webmaster, I needed visitors to think of Syaoran when they’re talking to me. What a weird rule.

#2: I shall never meet in person anyone I’ve known only through the Internet.

There are other small rules but those are the main ones. These are things that (theoretically) what Syaoran would do also if faced with these situations. Observing these ensured that I live up to my online namesake’s reputation.

As I grew up, I found it increasingly difficult to act like Syaoran. I realized I wasn’t getting the kind of life I wanted to live. It felt like I wasn’t really being myself by being this quiet, reserved guy who’s already nearing his 20s. I wanted to break free from my self-imposed bonds. The breakthrough came when I finally uploaded a photo of myself on my Friendster profile. But that happened several years ago.

It took a few more years before I could muster the courage to break the second important rule: the prohibition on EBs (eyeballs).

Last month, my Plurk friend mati invited me to watch Percy Jackson with his other friend. If I remember correctly (a forgetful person uses this phrase a lot), I was the one who suggested to him to read the books. Now, he has finished the entire series and I’m still on book four!

Anyway, I struggled greatly with this decision. I wasn’t sure if it was the right time to break the second rule. I had a chance to break it earlier this year when another online friend (you know who you are ) invited me and I declined. But this time, I remembered one of my resolutions for the new year .

To say YES to more things as long as it’s not unlawful, indecent, impractical or unmistakably reprehensible.

Meeting my Plurk contacts certainly didn’t seem like it fell under any of those categories. And so, with trembling hands, I answered mati’s email. I agreed to meet them at SM North Edsa. Perfect. I didn’t even have to travel far. Just a stone’s throw away from home. Haha!

The Challenge

I don’t have any pictures of the actual challenge to show here but the two certainly didn’t miss a chance of getting souvenirs. It seemed like they were used to doing this. Meeting online acquaintances in person, I mean. But personally, I was nervous the whole ordeal because I’m really uncomfortable meeting new people. More on this later.

The funniest thing in this experience was learning that mati’s friend, megane-kun is actually a guy! I’ve talked to her him quite a few times at Plurk and I’ve always envisioned that I was talking to a girl there. And you know how most guys are conscious and picky with their words if it’s a girl? Yeah, I actually did that to him/her! Imagine my face after discovering the truth that day.

Going back to the challenge, generally everything went smoothly that day. I enjoyed watching the Percy Jackson movie with them because of their reactions. Seriously book loyalists, get a grip on yourself. It’s just a movie.

And these guys are such foodies! They probably try out everything from food stalls to fancy restaurants. We ate at a Thai restaurant (Was it Thai? Couldn’t remember. Sorry!) for dinner. I… well, my tummy rather was more than mildly surprised with the foreign nourishments. But hey, I didn’t shell out a single cent that day so I’m not one to complain. If you guys are reading this, I’ll treat you back next time. Couldn’t make it to Wonderland.

Still a Syaoran…

So that’s it. I’ve finally broken free from the second bond.  But that’s not to say, I’m no longer anything like the old Syaoran. There are still traces of him in me as most people would surely notice when they meet me for the first time.

I don’t speak a lot, if at all, when I’m around strangers. It’s amazing really, seeing how I’m able to write a thousand-word blog post like this but strangely unable to express myself this much orally.

The first impression strangers will always get from me is that I’m a shy person. Many might even think that I’m being snobbish. Okay. Now, do you hear that? That’s the sound of my close friends screaming a resounding NOOOO!!! That’s because they know how loud-mouthed I can really get. I guess that’s the biggest change in me since I broke the first rule. I do talk but it does take a long, long while before I can get comfortable speaking with anyone new to me.

But sometimes, I do miss being this completely quiet guy. All mysterious and appearing to have a lot of secrets. But you must also know that Syaoran in the TV show underwent a huge change of personality by the end of the series. He became more open and easily approachable. I can’t say I’ve already achieved that last bit so I think I’m still halfway between “the original quiet Syaoran” and “the more transparent, post-TV show Syaoran”.

This is also the reason why I’ll never abandon this SYAORAN.net domain name and why I still use “Little Wolf” as my online identity. I don’t think I will ever grow out of this Syaoran syndrome and frankly, I don’t want to either. But I’d love to achieve that last phase of Syaoran’s personality someday. The only mystery left now is… will Sakura be there too once I’ve reached it?